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by planetundersiege



Series: A Drabble A Day Keeps The Doctor Away [300]
Category: Persona 5, Persona Series
Genre: Angst, Drabble, Fear of Rejection, Gay Ryuji, Internalized Homophobia, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-27
Updated: 2019-10-27
Packaged: 2021-01-04 10:29:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 402
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21196187
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/planetundersiege/pseuds/planetundersiege
Summary: Those were the thoughts of dreams, in a perfect world he would be dating Akira.But this was not a perfect world. And he wasn’t sure if it ever would be.





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Ryuji really liked Akira.

And by liked, he meant loved. Like, loved him romantically.

Yeah, he really loved Akira.

Akira however, did not know it, and probably never would. Because, he knew he would never be brave enough to tell the teen those simple words of truth, of fear. Because if he told him, there wasn’t just the chance of him being rejected, but, their beautiful friendship could go down the drain in a single sentence. Worst case, Akira would be disgusted and never want to talk to him again, he may even kick him out of the Phantom Thieves. Because, why would people even bother to be friends with  _ his sort _ ?

It was a way too big risk to take, even if his heart was heavier than all the lead in the world, making it hard to walk and even breathe. Every time he was around the raven haired teen, his heart literally ached, and all he wanted to do was to yell into the world how much he loved him, how much he cared about him, and how much he wanted to hold him close and kiss him, never letting go.

How much he wanted to be his boyfriend.

Those were the thoughts of dreams, in a perfect world he would be dating Akira.

But this was not a perfect world. And he wasn’t sure if it ever would be.

Right now, he felt trapped, the feelings were overwhelming. Every day it got worse, he loved him so much, but never told him.

Would he even accept him in the first place? After such a huge part of him was revealed, he was so scared, and therefor hid it away.

This way, they could be friends and still be close. The way he felt, it could ruin everything, and he would rather hide in pain than tell the truth of it meant Akira was still in his life.

He would never risk it.

He was already used to hiding, hiding from the world that wanted him gone, wanted everything different to change.

So, if he hid and tried to pretend to be  _ normal _ , and tried to pretend he just wanted to be friends, he would still have Akira by his side, and maybe, the feelings that dragged him down would disappear.

Yes.

He would hide it, that was safer.

And that way, he would always be able to see Akira.


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